Today a pelican arrived on my doorstep! I opened the door and he looked very angry so I threw my grilled cheese sandwich at him, but it turns out he wasn't angry, his face just permanently looks like that, and then I looked at it longer and decided he was cute. He dropped an envelope for me and said thank you and made a good boy bow. I said Thanks but I don't think he could hear me because his wings were flapping too hard in his ears. I imagine this is very loud. The letter said this:
COME TO MY HOUSE FOR DINNER TONIGHT OR DIE TOMORROW
-HANK
What does he want for me? And is it wrong for me to be making pro/con lists about this option? I wonder what he's having for dinner?
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